Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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