that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
