white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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