i may or may not be watching the land before time
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
