Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
