Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
