he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
