Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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