I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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