In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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