love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
