I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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