sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
