She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
