hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
