He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize
