Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize