see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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