and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Randomize
