I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
and she was petting her beer can
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
