zippers are such a cool invention
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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