2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
so much tequila, so little girl.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
