singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize