I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
