More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
