Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
