Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
