Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
