Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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