Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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