you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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