Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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