My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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