Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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