How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
