white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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