dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
