I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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