She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
