I skipped work to stalk him.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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