She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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