so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
