My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
