Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I have peed in a lot of sinks
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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