You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
