I wish I could teleport
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
