There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Randomize
