kristin has been a bad kristin
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
