Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize