I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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