i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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